Mission Im-pause-ible

The incident that I am about to narrate, happened some time ago when a lot many people were saved just in time by lack of time...
Confused ? Not for long though! Life is full of ironies and this, could very easily be counted as one of them.
Let me share this closely guarded secret , which tells us about that time when we were saved from a sinister conspiracy because of, of all the things - traffic jams! Yes those monstrous , good for nothing , all evil traffic jams!
Did I say- all evil? Everyone says there is a silver lining in every dark cloud, but very few of you would attribute that to jams, right? Missed flights, being late to office and schools, delivery of a baby in the taxi and dozen other should-not-have-been -all because of traffic jams  and how could I even think of a silver lining here! But yes, this incident will force you become beliebers again, Oh no! believers I meant! Believers of miracles, of blessing in disguises and silver linings ...!

The Psychology of Gaalis or Abuses

The other day it rained heavily. It rained cats and dogs, and sadly some abuses for yours truly.

I always used to enjoy driving in the rain, but that day it was scary, with visibility near zero. I promise not to drive , never again in that rain- with flashes of lightning and thunder cracks at the rate of one every 5 min intervals. The rains lashed so forcefully, that I feared the windscreen might just buckle under (Not exaggerating .you see the car is vintage) 

A Thanks giving not!

The first post of...anything is very hard to write. What does one write? A hello and Hi I am new here...and blah! blah and blah?
Well that actually is not the case. I ain't new and secondly I am an escape artist. I keep on running away successfully from every project that I fail to complete, before any one can say on my face- You failed!. So yes, I have had blogs that I could no more blog in and things that I could no more blog about.

But this is new, in a sense that it is new.
So it needs an introduction...and an introductory post this is .

Well since Thanks giving day was just a few days back, and since I now realise that I haven't thanked many persons in my life , whom I had been meaning to, I have decided to dedicate my first post to all those persons who made my life beautiful in a different way.

To the Other woman who came into my spouse's life- Thank you for making me realise what a sorry piece of ass he is. And also thank you for the chunk of alimony that I get , although it makes me feel like a pimp getting the money for letting you sleep with him.

To my spouse- Thank you for leaving me and all the less troubles I have now. Less mess, lesser person to take care of, less to cook for, cleaner bathrooms, lesser criticism- Thank you for all those that I have been relieved off.

To the girl next door who used to be so very much jealous of me. Every time you used to open your distastefully painted lips to bad mouth me, my self esteem used to rise one notch more and I used to feel my life worth living.

My thanks to the snobs who snubbed me , and spared me the agony of their company. Seriously, it was getting too painful enduring your polite lectures on how I was going wrong everywhere.

To the scheming colleagues at work- Every time you schemed behind my back to get me the nastiest of assignments, you pushed me closer to the top. Thank you , hope the view below is a reflection of what you are!

To all the males who tried to grope, grab and gag me- thank you for making me believe that I wasn't being stupid in my choice of man. Actually , there was very little to choose from.

To all the persons, who ran off with my money- Thank you for making it easy for me to kick you all out of my life.

To all the autowallahs, rikshawwallas, taxiwallas, shop keepers and others who have cheated me, my sincere thanks. It's for persons like you that God decides to be extra kind to me at times.

To my former magazine partners- Thank you for keeping on rejecting my ideas and write ups. No more deadlines to chase nor conventions to conform to!

To God, thank you for the free, thrilling, out of the world roller coaster ride, but I would surely prefer some smooth sailing in calmer waters hence forth.

To the readers who will not be reading this...well for a change you should thank me for not unleashing this torture on you.